SESSION 2
I open my door and Poppy is wearing a knight costume. With knee pads. Like you do.
"I've met someone."
"You have? You're seeing someone.”
She grimaces: ”Oh, no! Not a fucking date! Like a potential new boss."
“Oh.” I smile. Clearly anxious that I imagine she’s lonely.
"So I went to StreamerCon today, and this guy, Dan Williams, he recognized me and practically crossed the room to introduce himself to me. He knew what I look like! How did he know?! I guess people know who I am now. I had no idea what he looks like. Actually, I've never heard of him.”
“Dan Williams?”
“Yeah, I mean, like I said, I really didn't know who he was, but he's the producer at Cold Alliance studios. They're a rival of ours. We have a much better game, nothing compares to MQ, but they are really big.
“Anyway, I told him to fuck off! Isn't that hilarious! It felt really good.”
“You told him to fuck off. I'm confused.
“Oh, it's just how the guys talk. How we talk at MQ. That's how you let them know who's boss.”
“Okay…?”
“Anyway, he loved it! He said they are all big fans of mine. He says they are looking for a new creative director and they want me to come in and talk.
“I think he might be really great. He said he really loved my shovel.” She’s flattered, and not badass. “He said it was genius.”
“So he values your creativity. That must feel good.”
“Yeah. No one says those things. People in gaming aren't like that.”
“You don't get or give compliments.”
“God, no. It's really competitive!”
So she's back to her pseudo-badass persona. In an attempt to go back to what had slipped out, I say, "But you seemed to really like thinking about the compliment just now."
She looks at me and blinks. She seems to be teetering on the edge of badass Poppy vs. real Poppy. "It doesn't help to think about it."
"But you do think about it sometimes.”
"About once a month, probably. When I'm at home on the weekend and there aren't any big crises in the game to keep me busy, I'll think about it. About what it's like to be the only girl. And how I've been tough like this my whole life, and it's great for my work. I mean, I fit right in, all the way back to robotics club in Middle School. Only girl and I was proud of it!"
I smile,”You were proud."
She looks at me, pauses, then says, "Yeah. Other girls couldn't handle this stuff, but I thrived.
"Anyway, it also is lonely. I mean, I don't indulge in it, but sometimes when work isn't keeping me super busy, when I'm off for two days in a row, I think this all sucks." She starts to tear up but doesn't let herself cry. "I mean, is this my life? All coding and no social life? No boyfriend? Not even a close girl friend."
Pulling her armor back on: "Anyway. I'm a knight. I'm not like those kinds of girls. I'm tough as shit. Hey, that reminds me. I discovered a new streamer. A girl. She’s fantastic. Young millennial, excellent gamer, loves MQ, and this crowd of people were piling in to watch her play.
“So I told the guys we already have our new streamer, and they didn’t even let me complete my pitch. That’s why I think I’m going to talk to that guy again. Wait, what’s his name?”
“Dan.”
“If Dan thinks my shovel is genius, I can’t wait to hear he might think of Dana.”
Ending the session herself, "Okay, I think we're out of time. I’ll see you next week, Doc. You're not so bad at this."